Let Them Wear Spray Tan!

In a comment twice as silly as Marie-Antoinette's plea to "let them eat cake" Kelly Osbourne recently launched a campaign for The Prince's Trust charity by joining with - who else - St. Tropez fake tanning lotion to impart an important message: "Homeless people would feel so much better if they got a spray tan."

Please check out the commercial. It is hilarious.

God bless you Kelly! She says,

"They take young people off the streets and give them a direction. Did I say a direction, I meant they give them a spray tan session absolutely free and once they've applied it they feel a million times better!"

And then we learn about something called a skin finishing expert.

"Hello I'm Fiona Lockwood and I'm a skin finishing expert for St. Tropez." What is that? Who the heck knows, but I am going to use this 'job description' at parties when people ask me what I do. Fiona says, "I've been privileged to work with Kelly on Dancing For the Stars and have loved seeing the most amazing transformation from ugly ducking to swan in her."

Where can I hire someone like this? Is there an agency called Dial a Sycophant? If not I need to start one.



Over to Kelly. "I never appreciated the benefits of a spray tan. And to homeless people I would say, please do yourself a favour and get a spray tan. You might think you know, I'm not like Kelly and I'm not on Dancing on the Stars, I'm just a homeless teenager on the street taking crack but I say hang on, this is about your self esteem here, and being sprayed with brown goo will make you feel like a million bucks. Go book a session with a skin conditioning expert now. You will feel so much better I swear!"

Although Kelly was obviously sincere about her beliefs here (that or just brain dead, the jury is still out) - unsurprisingly parents went ballistic over the campaign saying:

"Telling impressionable young girls that having a spray tan and appearing on a reality TV show is the way to make yourself feel better is about as far off from my understanding of self-esteem as you can get," says Abi Moore of PinkStinks, a group set up by two mothers worried about the impact of marketing on girls.

So now the campaign has been binned. St. Tropez will still donate $15 for every $75 bottle sold, but The Prince's Trust confirmed to the Daily Mail last night that it is no longer supporting the campaign.

Poor Kelly! In a post on her Twitter.com page, she writes, "Heart broken over how the Pinkstinks stops money from going to a charity that really needs it!"

And she also claims the fiasco has knocked her own confidence, adding: "My self esteem has gone down the toilet. Just when you think you are doing something good someone comes along to tell you your (sic) not!

So what next for Kelly? Maybe a series of fake suicides via twitter. We can only watch and wait.

So is it Kelly or Gordo who made the biggest cock up this week? I think Gordo was well within his rights to call that Duffy woman a 'bigot'. She did say "All these Eastern Europeans, where are they flocking from?" did she not? He wasn't even particularly nasty about her. No his problem was apologizing about it afterwards and going round with a bunch of flowers so he came across as wetter than a baby's nappy. Get a backbone Gordo please!

Oh and a big thanks to my fellow Austrian MetropolitanMum for drawing my attention to Kelly's plight.