To Tampon With Love
Ode to a Tampon
Tampons are something no man wants to discuss
Like what is their function?
It just makes men blush
When we tell them that they just need to rush
To the chemist because we are a dam about to gush
They make silly suggestions to which we reply:
"No a rolled up slice of white bread won't do just as well
Do you want a poke in the eye?"
What is it with men and the embarassment factor
Of purchasing tampons
It makes them feel emasculated
Makes them lose their erections
But tampons are friends
They are fun toys for kids too
My five year old thinks Tampax
Are sleeping bags for 'mice'
the furry white creatures that huddle inside
When you need a tampon in a hurry they're nowhere to be found
You can't get them from drug dealers, ten Supers for a pound
Always be aware of tampon borrowing etiquette:
When asking a stranger if you can borrow a tampon
Don't be surprised if she doesn't want it back
I am fond of my tampons
And thank God they exist
For if they didn't
There'd be blood on the streets
Written for today's writing prompt over at Sleep Is For the Weak: 'Write a letter to something that you own, that you love, or maybe that you hate.'
What do you think - does it have good flow (ho ho ho)? Add another verse if you like!
- ► 2011 (872)
- ▼ February (4)
- ► 2009 (55)