Chapstick Lesbians

Well, I was gobsmacked when I saw a video today for the insanely catchy tune: I Kissed A Girl by Katy Perry:



I was hoping it was going to be rude, but all it involved was some floozy getting turned on by another teens cherry chapstick. I guess Katy Perry is less a lipstick lesbian than a chapstick lesbian. So listen up, Ms Perry, I suggest if you really want to make some waves, why not do something a little more interesting than licking her chapstick. [Is this song really meant to be shocking? I don't think it would shock even seven year old Scarlett who knows all about lesbians]

So without further ado Katy, here's some lyrics for your next song:

I SHAGGED A SHEEP



This was never the way I planned
Not my intention
I got so brave, drink in hand
Lost my discretion
It's not what, I'm used to
Just wanna try you on
I'm curious for you
Caught my attention

I shagged a sheep and I liked it
The taste of her grassy bad breath
I shagged a sheep just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don't mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Don't mean I'm in love tonight
I shagged a sheep and I liked it
I liked it

No, I don't even know your name
It doesn't matter
You're my experimental game
Just human nature
It's not what, good girls do
Not how they should behave
My head gets so confused
Hard to obey

I shagged a sheep and I liked it
The feel of her furry back flaps
I shagged a sheep just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don't mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Hope I don't get a UTI tonight
I shagged a sheep and I liked it
I liked it

Sheep are so magical
Cute hooves, sodden lips, so kissable
Hard to resist so touchable
Too good to deny it
Ain't no big deal, it's innocent

I shagged a sheep and I liked it
The pong of her hooves deep in sheep shit
I shagged a sheep just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don't mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Don't mean I'm in love tonight
I shagged a sheep and I liked it
I liked it

Also, do hurry off for God's sake and vote for me over at Moobs's Tenuous Connection Award 2008!


TC08 Nominee Button


I'm listed under the International Award 2008 section. If you vote for me I promise I'll lick your cat flaps. Kissies. Hugs.